One of the greatest fears that many men have is the fear of being rejected by people. When you are rejected by someone, you feel unwanted, unloved, and unaccepted. Basically, you feel that you will never measure up. Therefore, initial fears of rejection grow into strongholds of inadequacy and insecurity. When a man is unsure of his worth as a person or suffers from a negative self image, he will continually fear the rejection of others.
Many times, these men think they are weak because of their insecurities. They have a difficult time expressing their feelings because they feel they are revealing their weaknesses. They live their lives burying wounds that stem from painful memories of rejection. However, burying something won’t make it go away; it may even cause those negative feelings to grow. Therefore, the healing process should begin as early as possible, and should not be delayed.
When a man doesn’t like himself on the inside, he sometimes chooses to wear a mask to project a false image of himself that he thinks will cause him to be more accepted by others. To cope with his negative feelings, he constructs all types of false self-images and builds walls around his heart to protect himself from being hurt or rejected again. He usually gains his false sense of confidence from externalities like good looks, nice clothes, or a big salary. However, these masks are only ways to bury the pain.
True confidence comes from a mind-set that is renewed by the Word, not from appearances or an abundance of things. If a man lives this way for too long, he will eventually become so comfortable with the masks he wears that he might find it difficult to discover who he really is.
Lacking a godly perspective of who you are is a soul sickness. Men tend to focus on the rejection they face from others without realizing they have been rejecting themselves also. As a result, they have a sense of insecurity and inferiority based on what others think of them. Further, a man’s inferiorities are amplified when he is rejected by a woman he is interested in.
To cure this soul sickness, a man must gain concept of who he is based on God’s Word, and understand that God loves him unconditionally. A man who is rooted in God’s love and acceptance can love and accept himself. He has confidence in God’s love for him despite his imperfections. Further, he is able to embrace the qualities that make him special and unique, despite what others think.
Additionally, healing from the pain of rejection will come when a man refuses to gain his self-worth from how he is viewed by other people, but from how God sees him. He must believe that God sees him as forgiven (despite his mistakes), successful (regardless of his current stance or past failures), complete (in Christ alone), and accepted by God. Jesus said, “The one who comes to Me I will most certainly not cast out [I will never, no never, reject one of them who comes to Me]” (John 6:37, AMP).
As a man’s confidence in the Lord increases, it will become easier to remove the masks, and overcome the fear of rejection and inadequacy. He will be free to express who he truly is without reservation. It will be apparent that he is a man growing in the confidence that God created Him to operate in.
"Overcoming Hurt"
Price: $14.00 – CD
Are you holding on to hurt from the past? Carrying the pain of past experiences into your future hinders you from growing in love and attaining God's best. In the series, Overcoming Hurt by Dr. Creflo A. Dollar, learn how to grow in character from painful experiences. Turn your pain into power! Order today!
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